HCB Writings

 I’ve known all along, Physical strength does not make you strong.  It is the strength to ask For help with a task It is saying no or not at this time Instead of saying fine.  It is taking time to take care of you When you’re feeling blue.  It is loving yourself flaws and all And learning to stand tall.  It is trying again and again, That gives us the strength within   HCB

If dishes were wishes, we would have a ton. If dishes were wishes, they would always be done. If dishes were wishes, dirty would be clean, If dishes were wishes, the kitchen could be seen. If dishes were wishes, we'd have more time, If dishes were wishes, life would be sublime. HCB

  A spark ignites the Beltane Fire As we seek to inspire Growth and fertility, Passion and connectivity. Working hand and hand, We hope to better the land. A circle, like our minds we open, Both our spirits and our circle will not be broken, As we dance around the May Pole Filling our hearts and soul. Drumming, dancing, feasting spontaneously start Enjoying each other until we part. We will never tire of celebrating our Beltane Fire.  HCB   

 Drip... Drip... Drop I hope it doesn't stop! I love to feel the rain, It makes me happy again. Drop... Drop... Drip Outside I skip, Jumping and making a splash, As thunder makes a crash! Drop... Drip... Drop The rain drums the rooftop. Outside in the rain I play, And then back in for a warm, cozy day. Drip... Drop... Drip Down my face it does slip. A path of cool wetness it does trace, As I feel peace in this moment and space. HCB

What kind of present do you get a troll? Maybe we should have a poll. Should we get a bridge with a billy goat? Or maybe a giant overcoat. Would a troll like a dragon as a pet? Though it may be really hard to get. A dollhouse might be a surprise, But the dolls would have to be human size. What kind of gift would a troll treasure? How big would it have to measure? I just don't know if I am up to this task. I think the thing to do is just ask. "I just want to have fun with a friend, For a troll's loneliness never seems to end". Oh this is going to be easy to do, I would love to play with you. So we played and had lots of fun, Even after the setting of the sun. I will come back and play again, because I love to have a troll for my friend. HCB   

  Child, you should not roam after dark, You might run into the Cowshark. The Cowshark dines on human parts, Though it is known to spit out the hearts. If you are out past dark having fun, You may have nowhere to run. For it is very hard to flee, As it can run on land and swim in the sea.  So make sure you come in before the sun sets, Before the Cowshark's appetite wets. For if you are out after dark, You might be eaten by a Cowshark. HCB

  T wo roads diverged in a yellow wood, W hich could I take vs which I should. O ne was well worn and considered "good". R oad two was misty and hard to see, O ddly it was the one calling to me. A ngst took hold, making me want to flee, D eciding would be key, S omeone else decide, I wanted to plea. D oing what I know best, I put logic to the test. V ital information must be stressed, E very fact and figure must be addressed. R andom guesses I so detest. G oing with what the results suggest, E ven though they were hard to digest, D eciding to take the "good" road should be my quest. I struggled so much with this decision. N othing felt further from my own vision. A s hard as I tried to start down that "good" road, Y earning to do what I was told, E ach step made me empty and cold. L imping along until stillness took hold, L essons in the past had taught me to be bold. O nly the other direction would I behold. W restling done, I crossed a new threshold.  

Always at the ready. Locked into a fighting stance, She will defend the jetty, With a sure footed dance. With her weapons drawn, Into her enemy she strikes fear. She will be no one's pawn, So Beware!

 Oh what a crooked tree, Gnarled and twisted but beautiful to me. Full of life's twists and turns, For each of life's challenges another one it earns. For rarely does one live a life, That does not come with problems and strife. My life crooked as it may be, Is just as beautiful as this gnarled twisted tree. HCB

  A tiny cold raindrop lands upon the frozen canopy, Slowing down as it meets each drop that came previously. Losing the last of its warmth, it holds the last bead tight, Creating another ice bead that sparkles in the light. HCB

 Warm and cuddly, he is the definition of a living hug. Like the cartoon Tasmanian Devil, he zoomies up and down the rug. Giant and friendly, he is a real version of Snuffleupagus, Even snuffling every inch of us. An amazing actor he plays every death scene with such passion, Making you think death and dying has come back into fashion. So to our little horse puppy we do wish, Happy Birthday of your year six.

The sun warmed breeze tickled my face and arms, smelling of a sweet floral bouquet from the blossoms floating to the ground. Birds trilled and called, answering the calls of love. A quiet hum of the bees happily dancing from flower to flower, blended with the newly sprouted leaves rustling in the breeze. Peace, soft and warm as a kitten filled every part of me, erasing the stress and anxiety that had been there. Recharging my soul, relaxing my mind, and allowing my heart to feel love again. HCB

  Adventure does not have to be safari's in the wild, Adventure can be different but mild. Adventure does not have to be bungee jumping in the dark, Adventure can be a walk in a new park. Adventure does not have to mean eating wriggling things, Adventure can be trying some new sauce on chicken wings. Adventure is trying something new, Something different, something just for you. HCB

  Climbing over me, Hanging, wrestling, sliding down,  Silly binturong. HCB

  Waking up with a jolt, my brain leaves the fading and blurry world of dreams, Thrown into an echo chamber with loud noises from every direction it seems. Desperately, focusing on the disappearing memory,  Delaying the moment where chaos will over take me. The sounds grow louder, now fully indistinguishable from each other, Screens flickering and flashing, make me want to run for cover. One deep breath and then two, Failing to reduce them from many to few. I focus on one screen that I keep in the same place, It helps me start my day in this chaotic space. Breakfast made, sitting at my desk, my process has begun. I focus on each screen and adjust one by one. There is no off, mute or delete, I can only lower the volume, dim the screen and repeat. Part of me must always keep holding the settings I chose, A moment of distraction and back to the default settings it goes. Sometimes it fills me with dread, With what goes on inside my head. HCB

  Please do touch my hand as we drive together in the car. Please do touch my back as you pass by in the hallway. Please do touch and expand my mind with your deep and unique thoughts. Please do touch my soul with your twisted sense of humor. Please do touch my heart with your loving words. Please do touch and hold me when I need your support. Please do touch my face and wipe away my tears my I hurt. Please do touch me in the wonderful way that you do, forever and always. HCB

Image by  Lalailoken I awoke with such hollowness in my chest, I could not feel the beat of my heart. An emptiness that hunger cannot cure. Tears burned the edges of my eyes. Trying to recall the dream that had started to blur, I wanted to know what was the cause of the darkness inside. Then the memories hit like shards of glass, The feeling of warm arms holding me tight, Passionate kisses, loving strokes and touches. Ripped away through pain and aging. I miss the touch and connection that warmed me within. Now I feel empty inside. HCB

  It all started with a virtual kiss. Then a late night computer chat. Followed anxiously the next night with a phone call. Laughter, tears, deep thoughts and silly puns, Filled the hours, days and nights on the phone. We hadn't even met in person, Yet my feelings for him began to grow. Finally the day came for us to meet, Fear filled my heart as I drove to our first in person date. I remember telling myself no matter what we could be friends, And worrying that the sparks I felt on the phone would not be the same. I drove up and stepped out of the car, As soon as we touched I felt lost in space, I'm falling... falling... in love, into life, into my future... I am still falling deeper and deeper.. 17 + years and still I'm falling... HCB

  Unfurling and growing to the call of spring. The squirrels chatter and the birds sing. Stretching and growing bright and green, Becoming shade and keeping nests unseen. Warm weather fades and autumn colors blaze, Squirrels stashing acorns under the leaf maze. Letting go, floating and drifting until found, Catching dew drops and sunshine on the ground. HCB

  A loud, prolonged, blast of heat begins our ascent! Smoothly rising, slowly rotating, floating above the colorful fields, as the sun shines through the mist. Moving with the wind, becoming part of the air current, like a bubble from a child's wand. Holding onto every precious quiet moment,  until we land and the magical experience, pops us back into reality. HCB

  Immersed in a sea of vivid colors, walking through the fields, admiring the uniqueness of the blooms. Each angle creating a irreplicable canvas of hues. Rising slowly above the farm, a new perspective is born. Blooms blend together into stripes of color against a field of green. An important reminder that your perspective changes everything. HCB

Rushing from one chaotic moment to the next, Focusing on how to quickly complete my tasks the best. A glint, a sparkle, I stop and breathe, focusing on the web a spider did weave. Misted with glistening drops of dew, My imagination ignited and grew. A spider threading shining crystals upon her invisible strand, To entice wealthy fat insects into her land. Inspiring awe, the crystal web would make them hesitate, The spider would then, seal their fate. Carefully, and silently, I move away, Allowing this crystal web moment to stay. HCB

  Tiny little bud. Pop! Big Pink Blossom. Like kernels of popcorn, Exploding into bright pink balls. Transforming winter into spring. HCB

  Once my body worked as a team, Working together and following orders it would seem. Sure sometimes there was a complaint or an injury that sidelined one, but the others just worked together to pick up the slack so we could still have fun. The first to go rogue was my left thumb, It ceased to follow orders and was sometimes numb. My entire left hand decided to be rogue was cool, and started breaking every rule. Tremors that would make things clatter, causing plates and cups to shatter. My left side decided to take it slow, making it hard to just get up and go. My whole body has decided that it was in vogue, and every part seems to have decided to go rogue. HCB

  Blurred images, floating through my mind, encircling me like wispy mists above a mountain. I try to grab a memory to see it clearer, only for it to escape my fingers like smoke. There is a lingering scent, a pull of an emotion, sometimes even a taste, but it rapidly fades and I wonder, is it a dream or a memory? HCB

  Some slowly rouse from slumber, waking ever so slowly, groggily replacing figments from dreams with reality. Others wake in an instant, ready to take on their new lives. Once awake, they struggle within the confines of what has been their world, knowing it no longer will sustain and comfort them, but cause them to wither and die. They search for a weak spot, a place to break into their new world, testing, trying, pushing, prying. Finally, a small portal to their future is created. Fitting through is torturous, forcing metamorphosis, requiring strength of will and resilience to continue what feels impossible. Emerging through the tiny hole, they marvel at their new authentic selves, and now must learn to fly. HCB

Breathe in, hold, breathe out, hold. focus... feel the force within... Breathe in, hold, breathe out, hold. I feel the hairs on my arms spike, The energy surrounds me, As I move, I can feel the force around me, It is part of me, humming within my veins. Breathe in, hold, breathe out, hold. The excitement builds... I cannot believe this is really happening! I hold my lightsaber. With a practiced movement of my wrist, I start the spin. It falls. Maybe the force is not so strong in me. Again. Breathe in, hold, breathe out, hold.... HCB

Muted, distorted sounds, surrounding me, pulsing and pressing into my brain. Sounds of disappointment, anger, frustration and negativity create distorted words and phrases. "You can't do that." "You will fail." "You are not good enough." "You need to focus more on your kids." "You need to work harder." "You are fat." "No one would want you." I try to move through the sounds to get away, Yet moving any part of my body feels like I am deep in a vat of thick slime, Where movement is slow and ineffectual. The lighting and blurred figures are disorientating.   I scream, yet all that comes out is a nearly silent "glug". The light is fading, and I feel as if I am sinking further down. The words and voices are louder, I feel them seeping into me, Becoming part of me, consuming me. HCB

Walking to the mailbox on a sunny afternoon,  while listening to long and winding stories of his youth. Grinding gears, bumping trees as I tried my hand at a stick shift, while patiently encouraging me. Aiming for the target and missing more than hitting, while learning safety and skill of shooting a bb gun. Learning patience with a knife and a piece of wood, while telling stories on the front porch swing. Splitting and chopping wood with an axe, while teaching about leverage and power. Telling me in so many ways you love me, while saying it without the word. HCB

The warmth seeped down into my cold, dark world. I felt drawn to it, but the darkness pressed down on me. The warmth called to me, I stretched and struggled towards it, but I could not reach it and stopped trying. Again, warmth seeped down, pressure lightened. I tried again, moving towards the warmth; the darkness fading. Each stretch, breath and movement bringing me closer. Light replaced darkness. My soul expanded in warmth. I Blossomed! HCB